Madison to Pittsburgh

Just quickly filling you in on the last couple days because I am trying to cover as much ground as I can today in the direction of Provincetown.

I made it to Chicago in one piece, but it was the wildest drive of my life--black sky in the early afternoon, torrential rain, sustained 45 mph winds blowing across the highway and gusting up to 75 (sending tractor trailers with light loads swinging into other lanes and off the road), steady stream of garbage (cans, bottles, tarps, flip-flops) flying through the air slamming into my windshield and ricocheting off my car, truckers screaming like hysterical girls on the CB about losing control of their rigs or hearing a tornado touched down...chaos. When my CB/weather scanner confirmed the tornado and hail warnings I had heard the truckers screaming about, I decided to get to a gas station and take cover and spent the next hour and a half there with some other stranded people while a steady stream of people filed through the door to be told that there were no services--no power, no gas, couldn't sell anything because the registers wouldn't open, etc. Good times. When the sky finally lightened up again and it looked pretty clear that the front had passed, I made my way to Chicago to find Adam.

I was sworn to secrecy about most of our weekend together and the stories Adam had to share about life on the road with the Eagles tour and his long stint (3 albums and 3 world tours) with Norah Jones as we caught up on ten years of each others lives. I will say that we had an amazing 48 hours, hitting the most famous steakhouses, strip bars and deep dish places in the city, catching Keith Urban and the Dixie Chicks (wouldn't have said I was a huge fan of either, but they both rocked live) before leaving the show Saturday night for dinner with the band, after which we ended up crashing a very elegant wedding at the Drake Hotel...really? nobody wants to know who invited the kids in the skinny jeans, black shirts and leather cuffs?

Dragged myself out of bed (in more than a little bit of pain) around noon on Sunday and after coffee with Adam, hit the road bound for Pittsburgh because this guy who follows my blog on Planet-9 offered to give me a little tour of the city. Made decent time from Chicago to Pittsburgh (about 6hrs and 45mins) mostly because there were no cops on the road. I didn't think much of it until I heard these two truckers chatting about the lack of cops on the CB and one explained to the other that it was because they were all home trying to get their annual Father's Day BJ...huh...here I was thinking they were all home spending quality time with their kids...so naive...

Headed for Provincetown and a few days of R&R in the sun, can't wait.

JD and the Straight Shot opening for the Eagles 2010 tour at Soldier Field...and a blow up of Mr. Adam Levy's guitar while he rocked his solo--some things never change.  

Rendezvous with Mr. Pittsburgh.

 

Dinner at Primanti Bros--a must hit (a) if you like fries, cold slaw and a heap of melted cheese in the middle of your sandwich and (b) even if you don't because it's just an institution in this town.

Downtown Pittsburgh from Mt. Washington--the tallest building you see is the US Steel Tower, the tallest building in downtown Pittsburgh and the 35th tallest in the US. 

Bound for Chicago

About to hit the road bound for Chicago because one of my favorite guys in the world (Adam Levy, the guitarist I mentioned when I was in New Orleans, played with Tracy Chapman, Norah Jones, etc.) is in a new band with Charley Drayton (the drummer I met in NOLA who played drums for Simon & Garfunkel at the Jazz Fest) and they are opening for the Dixie Chicks and the Eagles Saturday night in Chicago. Adam and I became pretty tight friends one summer way back before law school at the National Guitar Workshop and then we fell out of touch my first year of law school because it sort of became my entire life to the exclusion of all other things, including way too many friends. I got back in touch with him just about the time I hit the road and we promised to get together and catch up at some point this summer. Sure enough, I got a tweet from him a few days back saying he was going to be in Chicago, so that's where I'm headed.

Speaking of life and people coming full circle, I spent last night hanging out with a fellow lesbonic blogger (her blog is called the Gypsy Chronicles) who emailed me just after I left NOLA asking if I wanted to meet up for a drink in NOLA. Apparently, she came across my blog one day while she was procrastinating at work and had been following it ever since. She explained that she was taking off on her own roadtrip around the country in the opposite direction and we have kept in touch ever since, hoping to meet up somewhere along the way. So, when she emailed to say that she was headed toward Madison I decided to stay another night so we could rendezvous here. I'm very glad I did because not only is she an incredibly interesting person (and an emmy award-winning sound editor who has worked on an endless list of big hit movies and TV shows), she is also a whiskey drinker and a fabulous wingman--best random company I've had this whole trip. We checked out the "Queer Shorts" (an evening of back-to-back short plays that happens annually here in Madison) because some girls I met the night before said that was the thing to do and then did a whirlwind tour of pretty much every gay bar in Madison until I found the real life version of the leggy Wisconsin blond I was picturing in my head.

I have to say that I really outdid myself trying to "keep it real" in Wisconsin, from the beer and cheese soup to the deep fried cheese curds, brandy old fashioneds, brandy slushes and Yahara whiskey (smooooth...and by smooooth, I mean ROUGH). Getting a little nauseous just remembering it all...but the classic WI leggy blond from lastnight is the only stop on my little flavors of Wisconsin tour that I don't regret. All the hotness of the hottest east and west coast girls, but so much warmer and sweeter...perfect Wisconsin girl, perfect Wisconsin night.

Fromagination, the most famous cheese shop in Madison and the best cheese shop I've ever found outside of France, Italy and NYC. I wandered in here after downing a plate of deep fried cheese curds and couldn't help but think how much less nauseous I would be if I had just eaten a pound of cheese...lesson learned.

The Capital is absolutely stunning, particularly when it is all lit up at night (tweeted a pic of it at night because I didn't have my real camera on me). Factoids: biggest rotunda of any state capital in the US (all granite, making it the only granite dome in the US and the biggest granite dome in the world) and that woman on top is pointing toward DC (good to have that point of reference to orient you as you stumble from bar to bar, particularly if you are supposed to end up in DC)

Quick Update from Madison, WI

A quick update from Madison, WI on the ground I've covered since I left Deadwood, SD, though I'm short on good pics and good stories because I've spent the last couple days in the middle of nowhere in the pouring rain. Haven't had a day without rain in two weeks, but the last two days were particularly bad.

You'll be delighted to know that I did manage to find Mt. Rushmore without any help from Mrs. Garmin (the 200 signs from I-90 to Keystone helped), but when I got there, the torrential rain and dense fog made it impossible to get a picture. No way could I do this trip and not get a picture of Mt. Rushmore--totally out of the question. So, I spent the night at a dingy little motel in Keystone, got my pics in the morning (from under my umbrella after waiting for an hour for the fog to lift) and then hit the road, headed for Madison.

I promised a woman I met in Glacier that I would (a) get a donut at Wall Drug and (b) drive through Badlands National Park on this leg of my trip, so I did, even though it meant not making it to Madison last night. I have to say that the badlands were alright, but the donut blew my mind...best donut I have ever had in my life--crusty outside, but so moist inside it melted in my mouth and it had this grainy, sugary maple frosting--beyond delicious, totally worth the detour. After the badlands, I jumped back on 90 and drove as fast as I could across South Dakota and half of Wisconsin through the torrential rain that never let up the whole way (sidenote: I fell in love with my car all over again yesterday--even with minimal tread left on my tires, I had better traction when I would hit those big puddles at 85-90 than any of the trucks and SUVs trying to keep up with me). I finally ended up in a motel off 90 somewhere outside La Crosse, WI around 11 last night.

I killed today finishing off the drive to Madison, getting my blown fuse and k40 fixed and answering amazing emails (some that honestly put tears in my eyes) from lawyers who just discovered my blog because abovethelaw.com (which I used to read religiously when I was a big firm lawyer, but haven't checked out once since I walked out of my office for the last time) did a piece about it. It feels so strange to be the subject of an ATL piece, instead of being the lawyer chained to my desk at 8 or 9pm, eating dinner from the cafeteria, reading ATL for a few minutes of entertainment and escapism because I have hours to go before I can walk out the door.

Just bizarre to be looking back from here at how my life used to be, as I read through these emails from lawyers (some chained to their desks and hating their lives and others who have recently been laid off too) telling me how inspired they are by what I am doing. I've been so busy just charging forward everyday since I started this trip that I haven't done much looking back. Today was the first day I realized how far I have come in the last couple months from the life I used to live and the person I used to be. Really eye-opening day...thank you for the emails.

Mount Rushmore from under my umbrella...

Wall Drug from under my umbrella...

Soaked mountain goat in the badlands from inside my car...

Badlands from under my umbrella...

More badlands from under my umbrella...

Glacier to Deadwood, SD

Just woke up in Deadwood, SD having covered a lot of ground the last few days. I spent Thursday driving from Glacier to Missoula, following a gorgeous scenic route that this woman I met the night before (when I pulled over for a drink at the Two Sisters Cafe just outside St. Mary) wrote out for me carefully noting all the reservation roads where the cops aren't allowed to patrol and don't have the authority to issue speeding tickets. Fabulous.

Friday I woke up early and drove to the North entrance of Yellowstone, all the way through the park, out the South entrance and halfway through Grand Teton Nat'l Park. When I finally checked into a lodge and hit the bar around 10, I immediately made friends with this awesome bartender (let's call him D) who tried to prove his love by setting me up with the only lesbian he knew of in the park. As soon as he got cut for the night (after begging a little) he disappeared for about an hour before re-emerging and sliding onto the stool next to me a little sheepishly, explaining that he had just had one of the most awkward moments of his life. Turns out he had gone over to where this supposed lesbo was working that night, dragged her away from the customers she was serving and proceeded to gush to her in front of all her co-workers and some customers that he had found the woman of her dreams, hottest, coolest lesbian ever, he wants to marry me, but I'm only into girls, etc. Whereupon, after a long awkward pause, she says, "um, I'm actually straight." His reply: "oh, yeah, okay, cool, yeah, okay, nevermind (that we all thought you were a lesbian and have for years)."

A couple whiskeys and "duck farts" (fyi crown and baileys) later, the phone at the bar rings and the bartender hands it to D who I hear saying, "yup, she's sitting right next to me." When he puts down the phone, he recounts the following conversation to me:
Non-lesbo: "Is that hot lesbian still at the bar?"
D: "yup, she's sitting right next to me."
Non-lesbo to her lesbonic roommate: "Get dressed! Get! Dressed!"
Apparently, they don't get many single lesbos rolling through this park. Shortly after these two girls appeared at the bar 10mins later, we moved the party back to the parkie dorms (where all the people who work in the park live) at D's insistence because, according to D, it's against the law for non-park employees to be on the premises. He was so excited that we were doing something illegal that I could blog about, I didn't have the heart to break it to him that sneaking into the parkie dorm was by far the most soft-core illegality I have engaged in this entire trip...

When I woke up, a little hungover and very sleep-deprived, yesterday morning, I set off on a scenic drive that a guy at the bar suggested the night before (southeast to Riverton, through Boysen State Park to Thermopolis, then up through Bighorn Nat'l Forest to Buffalo) and then picked up 90 in Buffalo and took it across Wyoming, hoping to end up somewhere near Mt. Rushmore for the night. I ended up in Deadwood (this little town filled with cowboys and bikers just drinking and gambling 24-7) after I got a little lost in the Black Hills around 10pm (because the power outlet in my car died so Mrs. Garmin was offering no guidance whatsoever) and started thinking I should just find somewhere to sleep. My plan was to catch up on sleep and give my liver a night off, but then I ended up grabbing a late dinner at the bar nextdoor, where I met these awesome guys from Bismark, ND and somehow ended up getting incorporated into their bar hopping bachelor party, including a stop at Saloon #10 where Wild Bill Hickok was shot in the back of the head holding his pairs of aces and eights (hence "Dead Man's hand").

I have to stop writing now because I have to go find some caffeine to make my head stop pounding and I have to go find Mt. Rushmore with no help at all from Mrs. Garmin. Wish me luck.

P.S. For those of you who have emailed me asking for bigger pictures, you just click on the pic and it blows up to full size...like magic.

Leaving Glacier

Wide Open (cop-free) Spaces in Montana

Bob and Paul touring Yellowstone in their 1914 Cadillac

Bison and a Geyser Field in Yellowstone

Entering Grand Teton Nat'l Park on a foggy, rainy night

The Tetons in the morning

A nice chunk of the Teton Range

I bet these kids wish they had sprung for some heated seats now...

Somewhere in Wyoming

Driving the Granite Pass through Bighorn National Forest

Seattle to Glacier National Park

In St. Mary, MT. Just pulled over to share some pics because I seem to be getting one little bar of cell reception here having had pretty much no reception since I left Spokane. The super quick recap: left Seattle and spent the afternoon working my way through back roads up to Wenatchee (the "apple capital of the world"), did one wine tasting there and then another at Tsillan Cellars on Lake Chelan (really enjoyed literally every wine I tasted here, their ridiculous medal count makes perfect sense to me), then worked my way along gorgeous farm roads all the way to Spokane where I crashed for the night.

Yesterday I left Spokane headed for Glacier, got off 90 as soon as I could to work my way up to the west entrance of the park on more scenic roads. Unfortunately the road from the west side of the park to the east wasn't open yet, so I had to go back out and work my way along 2 to 89 up to the many glacier entrance. Glad I did though because I found my favorite bar of all time on 2, the stanton creek lodge, which is basically a bar along the wall of someone's livingroom--coziest bar ever. When the owner got out of his lazy-boy, where he was watching some fox news while he worked his way through a bag of chips, to come over and chat with me (seemed like the polite thing to do since I was the only person sitting in his livingroom with him), he was full of totally entertaining stories from when he used to be a cop in Southern CA, including a story about being in a police chase with Patty Hearst and how she ended up getting away. Would give you the blow by blow, but I am so cramped typing in this car and tired of people staring at me because they apparently don't get many Porsches up here. So, I'll just share these pics and get back on the road...

Wenatchee: "Apple Capital of the World"

This is the 3rd deer I had to dodge on Rt. 2. The first two disappeared immediately, but this one could not stop checking out my car if its little life depended on it...

Entering the Blackfeet Indian Reservation, going to the heart of it today and was adamantly warned against going into any of the bars. Apparently white people are really not welcome and it can get very ugly very quickly, so don't think I'll chance it.

Driving up 89 toward the Park

Climbing higher...

Beyond Beautiful--this is the most awe-inspiring park I have seen this whole trip

I would show you the rest of my car, but it's too dirty :-(

Check out that ribbon of road...adored this drive.

Night closing in, my surroundings getting even more beautiful by the minute...

Girl Stories from Seattle

For all the guys who have emailed me wanting me to share more stories about my girl-related escapades, the following recap of my last two nights in Seattle is for you...

Saturday night I went out to the one full time lesbian bar in Seattle and as I walked in, immediately noticed this table of hot femmes checking me out. After about an hour of checking each other out, I finally went over and said hi. Turns out the two hottest girls (one blond and one brunette) are both professional dancers (and both swedish), so we started talking about modern dance and the next thing I knew they were demanding that I show them my best martha graham moves, which I did...to some hip hop song...in the middle of this lesbian bar with all these super butch girls with facial piercing and multi-colored hair looking at me like I was the crazy one.... At any rate, the hot dancers were duly impressed with my little modern dance show and proceeded to drag me to the dance floor promising to teach me some complicated swing moves so I can blow the kids away at my sister's wedding this fall.

It didn't take long (3 martinis at the most) before I got caught in a bit of a tug of war between the two hotties, with the brunette grabbing me and pulling me back from the blond every time the blond pulled me away to teach me a move, promising to teach me "a better one." Eventually the brunette's persistence won out and we ended up back at my hotel (after she ran off the blond and jumped in my cab uninvited). However, by the time we got there, I was totally over this girl (after spending the entire cab ride fending her off while explaining to her that I don't really like aggressive girls) and I broke it to her that she wasn't coming up to my room with me, which did not go over well at all (the recap: crazy girl clings to me all the way through the lobby begging me to let her come up to my room, then pretends to be okay with leaving before spinning on her heel and taking a flying leap onto my elevator just before the doors closed so she could get up to my floor). When she sat down in the hall on my floor and refused to leave for the tenth time, I decided to go for a little walk hoping she would be gone when I got back.

Just when I was coming back after a 30min tour of downtown seattle at 3am, this girl comes walking out, sees me and starts sprinting towards me screaming, "why are you doing this to me???" "I think I could fall in love with you!!!" "Just talk to me!!!" um, yeah, I spent the next 5mins sprinting through downtown with this girl chasing after me, screaming her case about how "amazing we could be together" until I finally got far enough ahead of her that I could dart down an alley without her seeing, which I did and stayed hidden behind a garbage can there for 20mins before I worked up the courage to check the street for any sign of her. When it seemed like the coast was clear, I worked my way back to my hotel along a totally obscure route, poking my head around each corner to check for her before I proceeded. Good times...

As for last night, I went back to the same bar (because I like to live dangerously) and ended up telling this whole story to this really cute (and seemingly sane) girl sitting next to me. When she finally stopped laughing, she insisted on buying a bourbon for each of us and invited me to move outside to the patio with her. While we were out there, this pack of girls, including a few that we had been talking to inside, stopped by to tell us they were going to another bar. The conversation quickly turned to my blog and how I had to go to Portland and do a little tour of those establishments that Portland is so famous for. I told them I had seen what Portland had to offer and wasn't impressed. After a 3min summary of all the disappointing establishments I had been to, a hottie in the back of the pack outed herself as a dancer (to the shock of her friends who had no idea) and offered to come to my hotel and give me the greatest LD of my life. Then she started rattling off in great detail all the tricks she could do (more than a few involved placement and removal of lollipops with no hands). Tough call...the smart, cute, wholesome, idealistic, law school bound girl...or your very own private dancer? In the end, I stuck with my sweet non-dancer (though I got the private dancer's number just in case) and I was glad I did because it turned out that she had some pretty fabulous tricks too...she just wasn't the kind of girl who would brag about them...

Portland to Seattle with my Planet-9 Posse

Just sharing some pics of our fantastic group drive yesterday that took me from Portland to Seattle. I met up with this posse of guys (and a couple wives), who have been following my blog on Planet-9, just over the river in Vancouver, WA. Then we headed south on 5 to pick up 26 west, which we took to 103 to 202 west into Astoria OR, where we grabbed lunch and saw the Astoria Column. Then we picked up the 101 and took it up to 8 east, which we took into Olympia for a quick photo op at the capital before finally splitting up in Tacoma so we could all get home before dark. Awesome drive, awesome day.

Beef Jerky!!! Someone is following my beef jerky and push-up recipe for body perfection, but I won't mention any names...

I asked for a top removal demonstration (the car kind, not the other kind). Have to say this car is beyond sexy and the sport exhaust sounded amazing, but I wouldn't want to be putting this top on in the rain on the side of the road by myself, um, ever....

We briefly contemplated negotiating a group rate for oral surgery, but in the end decided to just get on the road.

Passed our adorable little vintage friend on the road and he joined our posse for a while. Best view I have had in my rearview mirror this whole trip, nothing but a train of beautiful Porsches behind me with this guy bringing up the rear. I will never forget that view.

At Astoria Column. I would show you a pic of the column, but our cars are so much prettier...

Chasing down my boys while taking their picture--Safety first!

About to put down my camera and burst past them both, not just because I am a compulsively competitive little bastard with more horsepower, but also because I was the only one with a K40 and I'm thoughtful like that...

Made it to Olympia just as the sun was going down. As soon as we parked (where we totally weren't allowed to be) this trooper swooped up and started questioning us. None of the guys seemed to know what to say, so I took the lead and explained that we were "on a roadtrip." The trooper nodded and responded, "roadtrip, huh? Make it quick" and drove off.  If there is one thing I have learned on this trip, it is that if you are ever potentially in trouble with the law, just tell the law that you are on a roadtrip. Seriously, whatever it is-felony reckless driving, dui, illegal trespassing...just tell them you are on a roadtrip and the response will no doubt be something like, "roadtrip huh? Why didn't you say so?" every single time...